Sunday, December 9, 2012

New Idea:Movies I've Watched

I don't want to let this blog die. Trying to write book reviews obviously turned into a disaster, so I think I'll try to get back in the game by going back to how it started: writing about nothing, mostly as a way to get things off my head and keep track of some of the painfully mundane things I do every day.

One thing is to just keep track of movies I've watched. I tried writing it down in an actual, physical journal but found that really boring. Also, what's the point if no one will ever read it? At least with blogger there is an infinitesimal chance that someone will read it. But, whatever. Let me ask, though: Is there a movie version of Goodreads out there? I love how Goodreads gives me a chance to keep track of books I've read without having to write reviews, and just give them a quick rating. I don't know, is that even an original idea? Wanna buy it from me?

But I'll start now, and hopefully compile some kind of list at the end of the year or month. I watch a lot of movies. And I'll try to be as honest as possible and not fail to mention the admittedly terrible movies I watch on my days off when I just want to sit still for an hour without having to think too hard about what I'm watching. Like how I watched Tinkerbell the other day. And how I didn't hate it. It was actually super cute and fun and something I'd like to watch with my future daughter-who-will-probably-never-exist.

I won't even bother writing more than a two-sentence review, either. Gut reaction's the title of the blog, dammit, and I'm gonna stick with that. So, welcome to Five-Minute Reviews of Movies I've Watched.

 Ugh. Uuuugh. Big steaming pile of crap, seen through a dirty blue filter. What a terrible, nonsensical bore of a movie this was. I can't even think of one redeeming quality about it other than the casting of Idris Elba and Michael Fassbender, and even that is pushing it, because goddammit, no, it was a terrible movie and handsome men don't make up for lazy writing. Not even the visuals were that great. Everything was muddy and half-assed and confusing. I never once cared about anything that was going on in my screen, and never once did the filmmakers give me a reason to care. Definitely skip that one.

A while ago I asked my Facebook friends what the worst movie they had watched recently was. The question was prompted by having watched Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, which was fucking awful. Now, I don't think Prometheus was worse than that monstrosity, but it came pretty damn close. It's definitely the worst current movie I've seen this year. 

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